I hate icebreakers. The thought of sharing fun facts about myself with complete strangers sends me into a panic spiral. My mind turns into static and I usually blurt out something basic about how much I love to bake or read. Of course, after I’m done speaking, my brain starts working again, but by then, it’s too late. So for all the strangers who have heard my basic fun facts, here are my real ones.
I am on John Legend’s Instagram
Not many people can say they are on a celebrity’s Instagram, but I can. It’s not like I took a picture with the guy. It’s just an utterly crazy coincidence. One summer, I went to Italy on a school trip. After a hectic week in Rome and Florence, the last few days of our trip were spent on the beaches of Cinque Terre. It’s a beautiful place, with pastel-colored buildings and bright blue water. On the last night in town, my friend commented that she thought she saw John Legend wandering around town earlier. We laughed and went on with our lives, assuming there was no way she actually saw him.
When we got home, however, I got bored and started scrolling through his Instagram. There was a picture of a colorful, crowded street from Cinque Terre. It looked familiar. There were a group of girls in the middle of the road, and they looked suspiciously like my school group. Zooming in, I audibly gasped. It really was us! It turns out that earlier in the day, we were less than ten feet away from John Legend and didn’t even realize it. Even if it was a movie-like coincidence, I still claim that as my fifteen minutes of fame.
I Painted Wallpaper for Demi Lovato
Like most college students, I have a summer job, but mine is more unique than most. I paint wallpaper. Porter Teleo is a hand-painted wallpaper company based in Kansas City, MO. I get to spend all summer painting wallpaper and gossiping with my coworkers. Typically, it’s pretty easy. Someone else makes the decisions, and I simply paint where they tell me to. It’s like being paid to do a paint-by-number. One day, however, we were struggling. The pattern we were working on, called Synergy, was supposed to be black spots and lines on a white background. Simple, right? Everything that could go wrong went wrong. The ink we were using was too thin, causing us to drip black ink all over the white background. To hide these drips, we had to adjust the pattern by adding more spots to cover the drips. This made the pattern busier than normal.
Just as we began the last panel of wallpaper, the company’s owner saunters in. As I’m silently praying she doesn’t notice our mistakes, she casually announces the order we are painting is for Demi Lovato. I’m shocked. Of course, the order we kept messing up was for a celebrity client. Isn’t the allure of hand painted items that they are one of a kind? And this is undoubtedly one of a kind. Something I helped make was going to be hanging in Demi Lovato’s house. How many people can say that? Now you can watch Demi show off the wallpaper I painted in an interview with Architectural Digest. And I have earned bragging rights for life.
I Almost Died in a Wildfire
Well, that might be a bit of an exaggeration. During our annual summer camping trip, my family was forced to evacuate due to a sudden wildfire. It was the second to last day of our trip, and we decided to spend the day at a nearby lake. When we arrived, I noticed smoke over the mountains in the distance. After making a few jokes about our campground being on fire (which were not appreciated by the rest of my family), I brushed it off.
Less than ten minutes later, an urgent notification popped up on our phones, about an evacuation order for the Eastern Seedhouse region. We, of course, are staying at the Eastern Seedhouse Campground. My parents flip out. They drag us out of the lake, into the car. My dad steps on the gas, booking back to our campsite. His driving was so bad I thought we would crash and burn before getting back to the campsite. The road to the campsite was blocked by a police officer advising us not to enter the area, which my parents ignored. We had to get to the camper. The smoke is growing darker and more ominous, so obviously, we stop to take pictures.
By the time we pack up our things, we are the last people to leave the campsite. Our drive down the mountain is terrifying. My dad is speeding around sharp corners while I am blasting a carefully curated playlist featuring Getaway Car by Taylor Swift and Fireproof by One Direction in the backseat. Though my family did not appreciate the music. Eventually, we did make it out safely. When we left, the wildfire had been only a mile from our campsite. It eventually grew to cover almost 7,000 acres. It’s crazy how close we were, and how close to disaster our trip could have been. This has definitely gone down in history as the Schmitz family’s craziest camping trip.
The next time I face the horrors of ice breakers maybe I will remember these. But probably not, so I will continue to dazzle strangers with my default fun facts about reading and baking. What are your craziest fun facts?